Dad – unsung.net

Remembrance

June 6, 2016computers, home, In MemoriamNo Comments

Assorted parts of my gaming (main) computer... — Assorted parts of my gaming (main) computer…

As of yesterday it has been a year since my Dad passed away. I don’t think you ever stop missing a parent. You see them in so many everyday things. While the pain may lessen, the loss does not. There is a constant that is removed from your life’s equation. I miss my Dad. I don’t put much stock in miracles and such… but there was an incredible rainbow yesterday in Caledon. It lasted maybe 10 minutes and it was gone. But both and I saw the entire creation of it. Coincidence? Maybe. But even so, the universe did choose his anniversary for such a spectacular scene and allowed me to see it.

My primary (gaming) computer has been having issue for a while now. It was randomly deciding not to see the Express port and my video card. Which sucks for a gaming computer. This weekend it starting acting worse, it wouldn’t boot past the BIOS. Normally I’d just upgrade the whole system but my i5 chip (IMHO) is still pretty awesome and there is nothing wrong with the other components. So I just ordered a new motherboard. There weren’t a ton of options. I don’t normally get ASRock boards but it was the cheapest option. In reality it is probably a really old board. It is for a 1155 chip. *shrug* It was a cheap option – hopefully it will work out okay.

It was a beautiful weekend. Between bdot and I we hauled out 4 buckets of weeds. We have sunk a lot of money and time into the backyard. It is really starting to pay back with some beauty.

We keep losing heroes. Muhammad Ali passed away last weekend. He seemed to be one of the most charismatic and interesting figures in sports ever.

Update!
So the ASRock board arrived. Thanks Newegg. I tried to keep my old massive, ridiculous Cooler Master CPU fan… but the board was way too tight and installing that fan is nothing short of madness. I think it is part of the Hyper Series. What bollocks. So after it frustrating me for over an hour I just installed the OEM fan in 30 seconds. Sigh. Once it was on, I also had to switch power supplies and lost half my RAM due to limited slots… but still, it is up and running pretty well. The mobo is certainly not as nice as the Asus board. Now Windows is -of course- nagging to activate on a system that was activated and a legit key. It won’t take the key. Sigh… so I guess I could reinstall Windows 7, wait for the 10 upgrade and do it that way… I won’t though. If it nags a lot or won’t accept updates I’m simply going to run Linux Mint on it. Fsck Windows. Steam has made the transition possible. I may just do it anyway…

Yup. WTF. Diving in. Goodbye Windows. Switching my primary gaming computer over to Linux. *Deep breath* Wish me luck. I’ve been waiting for this day for years.

Update 2
Sigh. Well it seemed like a good idea. And I really WANT to switch to FULL TIME linux. But alas…. it is better than it was…. but it is still not there. Half the games in my Steam library aren’t compatible. Trying to do something simple like create a new Stream Library folder OUTSIDE of /home is a hoop jumping nightmare. So, with deep regret… I pretty much have to switch back to freaking Windows.

How disappointing. That said, for a non-gaming PC I’d keep it.

The holidays and good riddance to 2015

January 4, 2016bdot, Christmas, FamilyNo Comments

It has been a while since my last blog entry. We have been very busy. This year we hosted Christmas for my immediate family. My Mom came up early on Christmas eve night. I treated my favourite two women to a BBQed dinner while they relaxed in the hot tub.

Chillin' in the hot tub — Chillin’ in the hot tub

Not the best photo but it shows the backyard was also in festive spirit.

This year's glorious tree — This year’s glorious tree

It was a relaxing day. In the evening we watched Home Alone (by request from my Mom). Strangely the TV started acting odd. It has periodically had massive ‘black shadows’ across half the TV. The shadows come and go and sometimes the picture twists and distorts. It is really annoying. IMHO it is far too early for our Sony Bravia to go. But it seems it has. Sigh. How disappointing. As if the TV issues weren’t enough, bdot came downstairs to discover the fridge had died earlier in the week. The TV is bad but our LG fridge is 2 years old and apparently the compressor is dead. What a mess. So that meant depending on our old beer fridge downstairs for the whole week and hosting two events. It is into January now and it is still not fixed. So for every little refrigerated thing we have been running up and down the stairs for. Ugh.
Christmas was fairly low key. It was nice to have my Mom over and Steve (bdot’s brother joined us early in the morning) to open prezzies. Bdot gave me some fancy threads and a wonderful looking stereo for my car. It will allow me to listen to MP3s off any device. I’m looking forward to adding the Rock! I gave bdot Dixie Chick tickets and a phone holder for her car, since she is on the photo a lot. Safety first. JP and Rhonda arrived in the early evening. Bdot found a lovely turkey our local butcher. The bird was grown locally and naturally raised. Despite cooking a long time bdot wasn’t happy with how the bird turned out. Some of the wings weren’t fully cooked. The breast was. And we ate. Dinner was still amazing. Bdot’s stuffing once again getting full marks for supreme deliciousness. After dinner there were more presents. My sister thought it would be fun to make opening mine a little more challenging.

I was elated to get some gaming goodness! Fallout 4 for PC. After some initial issues with the game booting (had to update to Beta Video Drivers) the game has been a blast to play. I also scored for steam dollars well timed for the Steam Sale.
It was our first Christmas without my Dad. It was certainly tough. You see him in memories throughout the day… opening presents, cutting the turkey, the dinner table… hopefully it gets easier, he’ll never be forgotten.
My Mom left for her cousin’s that morning. It was nice she stayed with us two nights. The next Christmas event was at Barb’s sister’s. It is usually quite relaxing and low key there. The nephews are at an age where they are off doing their own thing… sometimes you wouldn’t know they are there (until the fighting begins). It was a enjoyable afternoon that included some World Juniors and a trip to Bestbuy. At the time our TV was still acting up sporadically. So with the Boxing Day Sale on we thought we would look at TVs. We decided to try a Samsung this time after the disappointingly short life of the Sony. The new TV is the UN55J6300AFXZC. We debated about spending another $300 to get the 4K TV but settled on the cheaper full HD TV. It has a bunch of SmartTV features and is bigger than our old TV, I expect it should be plenty awesome. For Christmas we got the nephews a day at the Aquarium.
The Aquarium day was a long day. We had reserved tickets for Saturday between 9 and 10. It was a quiet drive down. The boys woke up however once we got into the Aquarium. The two younger nephews had fun with all the activities and displays. The eldest seemed to be pretty bored, perhaps he has outgrown the Aquarium? He’ll get something unique next year.

The day went pretty smoothly. Keeping an eye on the two younger boys was certainly more of a challenge as they tending to occasionally wander. There was a little drama once we got close to home. I’m pretty sure we won’t take all three boys out again all at once. Divide and conquer seems to be a better plan. Still… was a fun outing.
Somewhere during the holidays bdot and I went out for Sushi. I usually like it but rarely love it. But for whatever reason the sushi was exceptional this time.

There was some debate about what we were doing for NYE. The plan was originally to host it at our place and ultimately after some talk that is what happened. So we had a house full indeed. 3 dogs 2 cats 4 kids and 6 adults. Phew. Needless to say the dishwasher got quite a workout. Everyone pitched in however and meals were handled pretty efficiently. The house however (from our POV) got pretty trashed. I guess what is typical for people with kids is a bit eye opening for us. Heh. It was a fun two days. We played some games, ate, drank, walked dogs and watched some hockey. We ended up in Newmarket for some shopping before saying goodbye. A great visit from Buck/BBB and family and David/Vicky and family.
After a nice walk in Palgrave yesterday we spent most of the evening chilling between the couch and hottub.
Canada had a pretty disappointing World Junior’s this year with a poor record during qualifying and failing to get to the medal round. The competition is excellent at the tournament again. I wonder if anything will be better next year in Canada.
I’m glad 2015 is over. It was unquestionably the worst year I’ve lived through. I’m hoping 2016 will offer new opportunities so I can get back to a normal schedule. Sigh.

Magnanimous

July 6, 2015computers, Family, In MemoriamNo Comments

At the in-laws cottage... — At the in-laws cottage…

Bdot and I (and of course the dog) were lucky enough to have her sister’s cottage all to ourselves for a few days earlier this week. It was wonderful and relaxing. Our BBQ at home is basically on its last breathes. Considering money is tight we are looking at other options than dropping over a grand on the gas BBQ we want. So, while at the cottage we tested out Bill’s charcoal BBQ. It must be over a decade since I used a charcoal BBQ. But wow… with a chimney… it is actually pretty easy to light and cooks really well.

The last day at the cottage (Friday) the nephews and everyone joined us at the cottage. It was a sunny day, perfect for more BBQing, a few drinks and relaxing. So that is what we did. We also discovered the magic of bacon wrapped hot dogs and poutine.

We were certainly enjoying ourselves but had to go home for my Dad interment Saturday morning.
I’ve thought about my Dad a lot since his passing. Someday’s you think of something and want to get his opinion then realize you can’t. The funereal director told us to do the interment as soon as possible because it reopens the emotion and the grief. He was right. Surrounded by just immediate family in the warm sun in Welland, we said a final emotional goodbye to my Dad. I had words written to say but I was overcome with emotion and couldn’t say them. My mother read a few passages illustrating succinctly the character of my Dad. Which was in a word, magnanimous. We added come scratch tickets and a Sabres hat to the vault. The morning was certainly a very difficult time.
The family met back at my Mom’s where the atmosphere changed to one of celebration and reflection of the great person we all knew. We stayed as long as we could into the early evening. It was the kind of day where my Father was really missed.
…
While at the cottage, Bill suggested I check out Dell Canada’s refurb site on Ebay. He said there are some really good deals on older computers and laptops. Deals indeed! I’ve got my eye on a wonderful little laptop. I’ll know Saturday if I win it or not. *fingers crossed*

Gone but not forgotten

June 22, 2015bdotNo Comments

Enjoyed some wonderful grooves from the Guelph Youth Jazz Ensemble with Brent Rowan and Jason Raso

Friday was a curious day indeed. Bdot worked from home as we had a Environmental Management and Landscape Architecture over to develop a drainage solution for our yard. He was a nice guy and I helped him most of the morning running lines and gather data for the plan. He seemed pretty confident that he would be able to figure something out. Hopefully it won’t cost an arm and a leg. In the afternoon I did some running around taking the car in and getting pet meds. Bdot was swamped with stuff all day. The hottub was a welcome destination in the evening.
This weekend we attended the Enjoyed some wonderful grooves from the Cuisine/Art event at the Alton Mill. We had tickets and could have went either Saturday or Sunday. When we decided we thought Sunday was going to rain and since the event was mostly indoors we wanted to the lovely weather outside Saturday. It ultimately didn’t matter as Sunday was beautiful anyway. *shrug* We spent part of Saturday on the shaded back patio dreaming about all of the things we would like to do on the property. Ho-hum. We passed on Sushi Friday night so we indulged Saturday. It was good but I often find there isn’t enough food. Hmmpt.
Sunday we spent at the Alton Mill. I think it was a poor decision to hold the event on Father’s day. Sure there were people there but I’m sure the Mill was disappointed with the turn out. I found it to be a welcome distraction. It is unavoidable to see Father’s Dad ads and media pretty much everywhere. As my Dad passed a few weeks ago this is the first Father’s Day without him. I don’t miss him more today. I miss him the same all the time. But the holiday does make you ponder about the past and present without him. Needless to say it was great that bdot took me out to the Mill.
It was a fun afternoon. We ate a lot of delicious food (props to Soulyve and Landman Farms), beer (Wellington Iron Duke Strong Ale was my favourite but there was some interesting beer from Beau’s Brewery which was new to me), looked at some art and enjoyed the jazz artists shown above. The stars of the show however seems to be the few week old goats. Other noteworthy mentions: bdot enjoyed the Live Kombucha teas and Speers Farms Amaranth’s beef sandwich was awesome.

I watched a lot of FIFA soccer off chip (I guess off chip? It isn’t off tape? DVR?). It is remarkable how much LACK of finish team Canada has. They generate a ton chances and it felt like they squeaked by the Swiss 1-0. It was an exciting game. The Canadian now wait and see who win between Norway/England today.
The NHL draft is Friday. Is it Eichel day in Buffalo?!
Watched End of Watch. An impressive cop drama. A rare solid pick from Netflix.

A worthy tribute

June 10, 2015UncategorisedNo Comments

The Sun finally came out... — The Sun finally came out…

Yesterday was an exhausting day… certainly emotionally and physically. We celebrated my Dad’s life with a mass and reception. He wanted a mass. It was quite a remarkable ceremony. The priest knew my Dad really well. Not only was he a high school and university friend but he said my Dad was pivotal in his decision to enter the priesthood. So there were many personal stories once he finally arrived. I’m not a religious person but there was certainly comfort and solace in the words, music and singing during the mass. It is a rare mass that the priest has a moment of emotion. When we entered the church it was raining. When we left the Sun was out. Pretty remarkable.

After the mass we met over at the Legion Hall in Port Dalhousie. It was an incredibly difficult day. I’m blessed to have compassionate and caring friends. In particular Pat, Joe, Dean, Mike, Kirk, Bonnie and Buck. My crutch however has been my wife. Who has been my shoulder and stability through this painful time. I love you very much and you show me through action each day how much you love me.

I met a lot of family at the reception. The line of the day was ‘Wow… you sure look like your Father’. Lots of hugs, stories and memories were shared. My Dad will be missed by many.

In the evening we took a lovely walk along Lake Ontario with my Mother. The skies had cleared and the evening was perfect. It was a pleasant ending to a painful day.

how do I put this?

June 7, 2015Family, UncategorisedNo Comments

TransCanada Trail near Mount Pleasant Road

Late Thursday night the phone rang. It was past midnight. As soon as I heard it… I knew. I saw the number was my parents. Bdot answered. She talked. It sounded dire. Her face went white. I knew. She hung up and said simply, your Dad had died. I don’t remember a grief heavier than what gripped in that next moment. I struggled to breathe and crumpled.

My Dad had been was bed ridden struggling with COPD and emphysema. The last time I saw him he didn’t look well. The night before he passed my Mom e-mailed me with optimism saying they figured out why he wasn’t eating. He did some physiotherapy for the first time in weeks. My Mother was hopeful for the future. Maybe we would even see him outside of the house. I was hopeful too.

The next night he called out for her. It was late. She ran to him and called 911. It was too late. He passed away in her arms. We believe from a heart attack. Suddenly my Dad was gone.

While we never expected a long time with him, we did believe we had a few months… maybe longer. Hopefully longer. Things are always left undone, unsaid. I miss you already Dad. You were always the one who showed me how to be a man. Who showed me what words like respect, class, fairness really meant. And not merely by words, but with actions.

The past few days have been difficult. Dealing with the funeral arrangements with my mom, sister and wife. Talking about the finality of things. Worrying about my Mom. Worrying about myself.

I love you Dad. Always.

Niagara and Toronto

March 16, 2015Family, friendsNo Comments

It sure felt like a long week. Getting information about my Dad and relaying that information to his brothers and sisters… So many questions, concerns… I lost count how many times I talked to my Mom. More on this later.

Friday night bdot and I were both feeling really tired. Her from work. Myself from stress from various things (my work situation, my Dad, the house, pets…). So we settled on watching what we hoped would be an uplifting, very light movie. We watched Big Hero 6. It has been a while since we watched an animated film. Especially a Disney animated film. But if Big Hero 6 was indicative of Disney’s current work… we’ll be watching them a lot more often. The film was incredibly fun. The character that steals the film is the modern friendly version of the Stay Puff Marshmallow Man. Baymax was subtle and his simplicity (and honesty) often gave me big laughs. The film was well animated, quick moving and very touching. It was exactly what we needed.

Saturday we did some housework during the day and met up KK and his daughter in the evening to watch a Toronto Rock lacrosse game at the Air Canada Centre. But first, dinner. We met at Marché. It was my first time at a Marché and it was a pretty interesting dining experience. You are giving a swipe card then can pick whatever you want from all sorts of freshly made food options. Pasta, pizza, fish, salads… there were a ton of options… I walked past someone with a pizza, and it looked good so I went with that. It was yummy. I ate it all. Thin crust, tons of cheese, pepperoni and salami. Om. It does seem to add up. I just has pizza and a beer and it was over $20. After dinner we made our way over to the ACC. The seats were in the 300s… which still had very good sight lines. Well… they would if the drunk oaf in front of you actually SAT in their seat. Sigh. Yes. The loudest, most obnoxious douche at the ACC was of course sitting in front of us. Anyway… The Rock has played the Bandits the night before and now the Rock were hosting them. It was apparent from the start of the game that the two teams really dislike each other. Fights, scrums, penalties, player ejections. Yup. It was quite entertaining. Rock took a big lead early. The Bandits battled back, then took the lead. It was back and forth until the end with a late Rock goal forcing sudden death OT. The final score!

It was a fun night. Lacrosse is one of the few affordable sports in Toronto. And one of the few Toronto teams that don’t create more disappointment than cheer.

I’ve been meaning to see my Dad all week. Sunday afternoon we finally got an opportunity to head down to St.Catharines to see him. My Dad is hospitalized at the new Niagara Health System hospital. Huh. I guess it has been years since I’ve been in the Fourth Ave/Vansickle area of St.Catharines. So much development! New plazas and so many new stores. We ended up meeting my Mom at the Feathery Pub. I enjoyed Fish and Chips and a Goose Island Honker Ale. It was a decent little pub. After lunch, we drove just down the street to the Hospital. It is certainly an impressive facility. Massive main hallway, lots of natural light and plenty of modern details. The Niagara did need a new hospital, the Dieu was dreadful. My Dad had a private room. It was surprising bright and not overly bland. The room even overlooks some vineyards. My Dad had a busy week of tests and visitors. By Sunday it seemed to have taken its toll… he looked really worn out and tired. So we had a fairly short visit. Despite his fatigue, he seemed willing to chat and talk about how he was doing. It seems a big part of his situation is mental as he really dislikes being in the hospital. Unfortunately it seems he’ll be in there for a few more days at least as he has to rehab before he can be released. It was good to see him and my Mom.
After the visit bdot took advantage of being in St.Catharines new commercial district and did a little clothes shopping. Ended the night with Zombies. It was a pretty brutal episode of Walking Dead.

The view from my Dad's room. — The view from my Dad’s room.

Bdot came across this impressive East coast artist named Adam Young. One of favs from him.

Love this .gif! Love Bandcamp. Enjoy.